World of Weird Al Yankovic

I just put the finishing touches on my newest parody. If you're a fan of Weirdo Jace, Ruben and the Novelty Shack (Mad Genius), or Nuclear Bubble Wrap, then just pretend to be interested in this.

My new parody is called I Don't Know How to Use a Fork, inspired by the performance by Weirdo Jace, and it is a parody of Burn by Usher.

So, without further introduction, I Don't Know How to Use a Fork

(For those of you without a SoundClick account, you can download it from here. Just click the FREE button on the bottom of the page and wait for a minute or two while the download loads.)

Here are the lyrics:

I don’t understand…
Why…
I can’t even hold onto this…
I know this is something I’ve gotta do…
But that don’t mean I want to…
What I’m tryin’ to say is that…
I don’t know how to use a fork,
I feel like...I don’t understand the prongs…
The handle’s too small,
I let it go now…
‘Cuz when I hold on, it hurts me,
But I’ve gotta let it burn,

It’s gonna burn for me to say this,
It’s coming from my soul,
I’ve spent a long time preparing a romantic table,
As I start to take it out, I quickly put it back away,
It’s silverware, a fork; it is the cause of all my pain,
I sit down with one and I start to try to handle it,
Now I’m hurtin’, baby, bloody napkins, baby,
I put it down before I lose half of my fingertips,
I don’t know how to,

Use a fork,
There’s something that I’ve told nobody,
Don’t know how…
But I don’t, want you to go,
Not ready to,
Hold it up like you do and stab it into my food,
It won’t work,
It won’t work,
I don’t know how to use a fork,
Now, there’s something I must tell you,
I hate the thought of it ever glaring through,
I know that it will show,
When I eat my food,
It won’t work,
It won’t work,
I don’t know how to use a fork,

Yellow Pages, where’s the fork school?
Not finding anything, but I want you,
To know that eating ain’t the same,
When I’m doubled over in pain,
Yes, I try to grab it in my hand,
And it seems I can’t understand,
It’s just the way I feel,
I look at the steak,
I put down my plate,
And I want to put it back,
But what I’ve gotta do now,
Even if it means the plates might crack,
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
Man, I don’t know what I’m gonna do without my food,
I’ve been trying for so long,
It’s been 27 days, 14 hours, and I still don’t know how to use a fork!

Use a fork,
There’s something that I’ve told nobody,
Don’t know how…
But I don’t, want you to go,
Not ready to,
Hold it up like you do and stab it into my food,
It won’t work,
It won’t work,
I don’t know how to use a fork,
Now, there’s something I must tell you,
I hate the thought of it ever glaring through,
I know that it will show,
When I eat my food,
It won’t work,
It won’t work,
I don’t know how to use a fork,

I’m twisted, ‘cuz one side of me just wants to continue using spoons,
And on the other side, I want to break down and cry,
Ooh!
I’m twisted, ‘cuz one side of me just wants to continue using knives,
And on the other side, I want to break down and cry,
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
Ooh, ooh, ooh,
Don’t know how to use a…
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
So many steaks, so much baked flour,
I’m still burnin’ until I can learn!

Use a fork,
There’s something that I’ve told nobody,
Don’t know how…
But I don’t, want you to go,
Not ready to,
Hold it up like you do and stab it into my food,
It won’t work,
It won’t work,
I don’t know how to use a fork,
Now, there’s something I must tell you,
I hate the thought of it ever glaring through,
I know that it will show,
When I eat my food,
It won’t work,
It won’t work,
I don’t know how to use a fork.

iisryan27 @ Jun 16 2005, 07:25 PM wrote: As I start to take it out, I quickly put it back away,
.[/SIZE]

That could be taken very wrong.........Good song though!

The last song my band and I had to record for the album...


The Invasion What Came from All That Space - parody of "1985" by Bowling for Soup.

new song about my neighbors who are very uptight about their dog...
DOGGY
(Parody of Drowning Pool's "Bodies")
[Chorus]
Don’t let doggy through the door
Don’t let doggy through the door
Don’t let doggy through the door
Don’t let doggy through the door

He’s now outside
He’s been denied
One – dug up the backyard
Two – he kept chasing cars
Three – dug up the backyard
Four – he kept chasing cars
One – he got in the trash
Two – a vase he did smash
Three – he got in the trash
Now

[Chorus]

He won’t come in
Look what he did
One – dug up the backyard
Two – he kept chasing cars
Three – dug up the backyard
Four – he kept chasing cars
One – he got in the trash
Two – a vase he did smash
Three – he got in the trash
Now

I’ll let him in but only if
He doesn’t give my butt a sniff
you wanted in now you're here
Why did you try to smell my rear?

[Chorus]


WEIRDABBOTT

You guys are getting better and better at your parodies! I only wish I wasn't so old, because I don't know most of the songs you're parodying! But your lyrics are hilarious on many levels, the way Al's are.

Kevbo1987 @ Jun 16 2005, 07:32 PM wrote: That could be taken very wrong.........Good song though!

I didn't ever think about that before.

weirdojace @ Jun 16 2005, 10:51 PM wrote: The last song my band and I had to record for the album...


The Invasion What Came from All That Space - parody of "1985" by Bowling for Soup.

OHS NAP



Oh and also... Batmobile's delayed.

Data Disc Update - Well, last night we got an AWESOME computer! I mean this computer has 30 gigs of memory...a celeron processor, CD-RW and everything. It totally blows the outdated 1997 computer I was using to work on the data disc away...that computer doesn't even have half a gig of memory...any way I'm going to pick up where I left off on this computer. I still plan on releasing it in the fall!
- Matt

thatoneguy @ Jun 18 2005, 07:56 AM wrote: Data Disc Update - Well, last night we got an AWESOME computer! I mean this computer has 30 gigs of memory...a celeron processor, CD-RW and everything. It totally blows the outdated 1997 computer I was using to work on the data disc away...that computer doesn't even have half a gig of memory...any way I'm going to pick up where I left off on this computer. I still plan on releasing it in the fall!
- Matt

*pfft* mines better.

Driew_La_27 @ Jun 18 2005, 09:33 PM wrote: *pfft* mines better.

LOL, yeah right.