WOWAY Apprentice: Global Announcement

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TMBJon
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WOWAY Apprentice: Global Announcement

Post by TMBJon »

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Wow. This is some crowd. Thousands. This is beyond anyone's expectations. There's never been a crowd like this.
It's great to be here on a wonderful forum: World of Weird Al Yankovic. It's an honor to have all of you here for this major announcement. It's going to be huge, it's going to be luxurious, and not only that, it's going to be historic.

First, let me address the obvious confusion: I, billionaire investor, real estate mogul, and presidential fruntrunner Donald J. Trump, have been posting for the past 12 years on WOWAY using the pseudonym TMBJon, which stands for Trump Multi Billionaire Don. Every post you've seen on this forum which was allegedly written by "Jon Katz" has actually been part of a long 12-year cover-up so that, at just the right time, I would be able to come to you as a trusted forum member to make this profound announcement:

Our forum is in serious trouble, folks. It's true. I've seen some of the topics on this forum lately. Some of the new members. We used to have victories here, and we don't have them anymore. I mean, I have victories... Some other members on here, they have victories. They used to say that WOWAY was the greatest forum on the Internet. It's not true anymore. When was the last time we beat reddit at anything? It doesn't exist, folks. When other forums send their members over here, they're not sending their best people. They're not sending you. They're sending people with a lot of problems, and they're dumping these problems on us. They're sending morons. They're sending trolls. They're neckbeards. And some, I assume are good people.

Our forum is in serious trouble, and our leaders. Our supposed leaders, I should say. Our leaders are failing us. Our moderators and our administrators are failing, because they are all talk and no action. Frankly, it's a bit pathetic. I hear from these moderators. They come up to my office and want me to support them. They don't know how to make the forum great again, so they come up to my office. And they don't know! They say "Mr. Trump, what can we do? Can we have your support? How do we do it?" So I watch these moderators and admins, I'm telling you they can't do it. They don't know how to make WOWAY great again. They're controlled fully by the lobbyists and the special interests and the donors, fully.

Our forum needs a truly great leader. We need a truly great leader now, and we need a leader who wrote "The Art of The Deal". We need someone who can take the brand of WOWAY and make it great again. It's not great again. We need someone who can literally take this forum and make it great again. We can do that. It's not hard. And let me tell you. I love my life. I love being a member of this forum. You know, all my life I've always heard that a truly successful person, or even a modestly successful person, can't host their own reality game on WOWAY. Just can't happen. And yet, that's the kind of mindset you need to make this forum great again!

So ladies and gentlemen... I am officially hosting a new reality game on WOWAY... and we are going to make this forum great again!

It can happen. This forum has tremendous potential. We have tremendous members. We have members that aren't posting. But they are going to have incentive to post, and they'll be proud and they will love it, and we'll be thriving. It can happen. I will be the greatest reality game host that God has ever created. I tell you that.

Somebody said to me the other day, a newbie, but a very nice newbie. They said to me, "Mr. Trump, you're not a nice person." But actually, I am. People that know me, like me. My family likes me. Anyway, they said to me, "Mr. Trump, you're not a nice member. How are you going to get people to play your game?" I said, "I don't know, I think I'm a nice person. I give money to charity and all these things. I'm a very nice person." But I said, "This is going to be a reality game that's based on competence, because people are tired of these nice people trying and failing."

People said I wouldn't do it. They said I wouldn't want to be a host of a game show when I have so much else going on for me. You know, I have thousands of likes on my posts in this forum. Thousands. I have more likes than more than anyone, really. The public figure is in the low thousands, but really it's much, much higher than that. I have thousands of people liking my posts. People PM me all the time and they tell me, "Mr. Trump, I wish I could like more of your posts, but there's a backlash. I'm trying to keep my liked posts lower than the amount that like my posts" or whatever they say. So I have very high level people on this forum who told me my real like count is much higher. It's well above 100,000 likes.

Anyway, what we're going to do here is really terrific. It's huge, it's luxurious, and frankly, it's quite historic. We are going to bring back my extremely successful award-winning television show, Celebrity Apprentice, right here on this forum.

What we need to get started is ten forum members who want to be contestants on this reality game. It's going to be difficult, and it's going to require a lot of work, more than any other reality game in the history of this forum. I know the demand to participate is going to be huge, it's going to be through the roof, and it's going to break lots of records. It may even shut down the WOWAY server for a bit, who knows.

If you are interested in being a contestant in this game show, just reply to this thread and tell me why I, Donald Trump, the greatest businessman in American history and, frankly, the greatest member in WOWAY history as well, should choose you as one of the ten contestants in this game. You will be challenged, you will be put to the test. Most of you will fail, and frankly you will fail in a very public way. And in the end, one of you will be chosen to be the WOWAY Apprentice.

Sadly, the great World of Weird Al Yankovic dream is dead.
But if you join me on this reality game, I will bring it back bigger and better and stronger than before, and we will Make WOWAY Great Again.

Thank you very much.

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Last edited by TMBJon on Fri Aug 21, 2015 9:59 pm, edited 3 times in total.
I couldn't tell a dirt clod from a plate of caviar.
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rockabillynurse
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Re: WOWAY Apprentice

Post by rockabillynurse »

Alright, Trump. I've been hovering on this post, eager for the promise of a world in which WOWAY rises again yet feeling entirely inadequate to rise to the occasion. As a newbie, I could tell immediately that this place must have been quite something in its heyday. I felt compelled to donate to the site almost immediately because it felt like the only helpful thing I could do (having nothing particularly novel to add to any of the already existing conversations and realizing every topic idea I had had been covered about six times over). I won't be selected for this as a near-stranger whose only contribution so far has been fangirling but I thought I ought to throw my hat into the ring as a gesture of solidarity from a newbie who missed the boat the first time. We do care. Let's do this thing.

(Hey, someone had to go first. I'm looking at you online people.)
July 25th 2015 - Casino NB, Moncton, New Brunswick (sung to during WBUL!)
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Re: WOWAY Apprentice

Post by BullMoose »

Deer Donuld Trimp,
I think ur gret cos ur funny on TV. Ur gret on teh form cos u hav a lot of post. I admre tat!
Lov
Nafan

:) <3

However, on my more intelligent, less sedated, less sarcastic, more 'me' side... I personally thought the forum was great. It seems the Mandatory World Tour has garnered a lot of genuine interest and delight. But if you, Big Man DT says it's failing, I guess I can't argue. I never expected myself to post or make such lovely friends as I did. Believe me, I refresh the "New Posts" section often. Am I of these annoying newbies you mentioned? Sniff. I'm sorry. (No, I didn't sniff you. It was more like a sniveling sniff. I mean. I can sniff you if you want? Would that creep you out?)

Also, publicly shaming myself is my gig.
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mellow weasel
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Re: WOWAY Apprentice

Post by mellow weasel »

Image
:lol:
Is this game a real thing or just a part of a ramble? :?
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KatrinatheGood
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Re: WOWAY Apprentice

Post by KatrinatheGood »

mellow weasel wrote:[ http://cdn.meme.am/instances/54955114.jpg ]
:lol:
Is this game a real thing or just a part of a ramble? :?
I was wondering the same thing. If it's a legit game; I quote the wise Dory: "Game? I love games! Pick me!"
Last edited by KatrinatheGood on Mon Aug 10, 2015 2:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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TMBJon
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Re: WOWAY Apprentice

Post by TMBJon »

Folks, this is real. This is really going to happen.
A lot of people say Trump isn't really going to run a reality game. He's just doing it for the ratings, for the likes, for the publicity. Those people are haters, and they are losers. And frankly, they're kind of sad. When Trump says he's going to do something, he does it and he does it big. You know, I started off in a small office in Brooklyn and Queens with my father. I love my father. He was a great negotiator. He used to say, "Donald, don't go into Manhattan. Don't do it." But I said, "Dad, I've gotta go into Manhattan and build those tall buildings." So I ventured into Manhattan and did a lot of great deals. The Grand Hyatt Hotel, the convention center on the west side... I was responsible for a lot of the great deals, and I did them early and young. And now I'm venturing out all over the world, and I love what I'm doing. And now it's time to build up this great Weird Al forum, WOWAY.

But you know, a lot of the pundits, they say I'm not going to do it, but I'm here today to tell you that I'm doing it, and this game is 100% real. A lot of people get turned off by my big personality, but by the way this is the kind of mindset you need to have in order to make this forum great again. Somebody said, "Oh, that's crass." It's not crass, it's true.

My first post went up 12 hours ago, and it's already drawing in a record response. I'm getting word from all sorts of people, people who are afraid to post and say they're in. They tell me, "Donald, I want to do it, but I don't know if this is real." It's real! Sign up today. Don't worry that the response is going to be overwhelming, and that we're going to get folks from all over the world who want to be involved in this historic reality game. However many people we get, the first thing we'll do is sort it down to 10 contestants. The rest of the pack who don't make the cut, don't worry we'll find some way for you to be involved too. So please, I am honored and humbled by the response so far, and I look forward to starting the game. But first we need the players, so sign up below!
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Re: WOWAY Apprentice

Post by Wizzerkat »

Oh, Mr. Trump, I have great interest in learning at your side show side, seeing as you love the ladies, but do I dive in knowing the possibility exists that I will turn out to be a loser like that Rosie O'Donnell? I guess we shall see!

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Re: Donald Trump presents... WOWAY Apprentice

Post by Killingsworth »

I don't think I want to be a part of this. Just the thought of participating in another WOWAY reality game or awards show makes blood start pouring out of my nose or my, uh...whatever. Only a true deviant would want to participate.
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Re: Donald Trump presents... WOWAY Apprentice

Post by TMBJon »

Killingsworth wrote:I don't think I want to be a part of this. Just the thought of participating in another WOWAY reality game or awards show makes blood start pouring out of my nose or my, uh...whatever. Only a true deviant would want to participate.
As of today, Donald J. Trump has decided not to include Killingsworth as a contestant on WOWAY Apprentice. It was my idea, and not his. Killingsworth is weak. Long ago, I told Mr. Killingsworth that he would not be invited to join the cast of WOWAY Apprentice because I am hosting this show to Make WOWAY Great Again. Casey Killingsworth (his true full name) is a level one technician who couldn't even answer a level two question without asking his manager for help. I had a great time using him as a pawn to win WOWAY Survivor in 2012.

And a side note to all the haters and losers who are saying that this game is not popular on WOWAY because it has so few likes, there's something wrong with the forum software that's not allowing likes on global announcements. Otherwise, I'm told there would be dozens of likes on each post. People are telling me this game is immensely popular so far, and it's still been less than 24 hours since the invitation for players to join has been open. Anyone on the forum is invited to join except Killingsworth, whom I disinvited a very long time ago.
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Re: Donald Trump presents... WOWAY Apprentice

Post by rangerbob »

lol is this live or memorex? LOL
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