These are a couple of unfinished parody lyrics I've been working on that I've gotten stuck on. I wanted to present them side by side with the original lyrics for reference purposes, but nothing I've tried seems to be working, so I'm just going to present what I've got anyway with the original lyrics in quote code. The first parody lyric is entitled NO MORE BEERS, a parody of Ozzy Osbourne's NO MORE TEARS.
NO MORE TEARS
by Ozzy Osbourne
Verse 1
The light in the window is a crack in the sky
I stare into darkness in the blink of an eye
A levee of tears to learn she'll never be coming back
The man in the dark will bring another attack
Your mama told you that you're not supposed to talk to strangers
Look in the mirror tell me do you think your life's in danger yeah
No more tears
No more tears
NO MORE BEERS
(to the tune of NO MORE TEARS by Ozzy Osbourne)
(Parody lyrics by David Barnes)
Verse 1
The liquor store closes at a quarter 'til two
They're all out of Bud Light and Pabst Blue Ribbon too
* (Lyrics pending)
* (Lyrics pending)
* (Lyrics pending)
* (Lyrics pending)
No more beers
No more beers
Verse 2
Another day passes as the night closes in
The red light goes on to say it's time to begin
I see the man around the corner waiting can he see me
I close my eyes and wait to hear the sound that someone's screaming here
No more tears
No more tears
Verse 2
* (Lyrics pending)
* (Lyrics pending)
I see the cop around the corner waiting there to bust me
* (Lyrics pending)
No more beers
No more beers
(Undecipherable spoken words)
It's just a hand in the bush
(I'm not sure what I want to put here to match what was said during the instrumental break, but I was thinking that maybe having a cop talking to a drunk driving suspect through a bullhorn would work here. It'd probably help if I could actually figure out what the first part of the quote was, but no matter how many times I've heard it, I still can't make it out. I can only make out the second part.)
Verse 3
So now that it's over can't we just say goodbye (bye bye, bye bye)
I'd like to move on and make the most of the night
Maybe a kiss before I leave you this way
Your lips are so cold, I don't know what else to say
I never wanted it to end this way my love my darling
Believe me when I say to you in love I think I'm falling here
No more tears
No more tears
No more tears
No more tears
Verse 3
* (Lyrics pending)
* (Lyrics pending)
Maybe a drink before I'm taken away
The cuffs are so tight I don't know what else to say
* (Lyrics pending)
* (Lyrics pending)
No more beers
No more beers
No more beers
No more beers
It's just a hand in the bush
In the bush...(Continues until it fades out)
(Maybe a cop reading the Mirana Rights to a suspect as it fades out would work here)
****************************************************************
The other lyric I've gotten stuck on is for Colbie Callait's BUBBLY, which I'm tentatively calling FROOT LOOPS, mainly because every time I hear the chorus, I hear the old Froot Loops jingle from back in the '70s
I follow my nose
It always knows
The flavors of fruit
Wherever it goes
This is what I've got so far:
BUBBLY
by Colbie Callait
Verse 1
I've been awake for a while now
You've got me feelin' like a child now
'Cause every time I see your bubbly face
I get the tingles in a silly place
FROOT LOOPS
(to the tune of BUBBLY by Colbie Callait)
(Parody Lyrics by David Barnes)
Verse 1
I've been hungry for a while now
My stomach's grumbling like a wild sow
And every time I see the toucan's face
There's something yummy in my dining place
Chorus
It starts in my toes
And I crinkle my nose
Wherever it goes
I'll always know
That you make me smile
Please stay for a while now
Just take your time
Wherever you go
Chorus
I follow my nose
Because it always knows
The flavor of fruit
Wherever it goes
* (Lyrics pending)
* (Lyrics pending)
* (Lyrics pending)
Wherever it goes
Verse 2
The rain is fallin' on my window pane
But we are hidin' in a safer place
Under covers staying dry and warm
You give me feelings that I adore
Transition
But what am I gonna say
When you make me feel this way
I just mm
Verse 3
I've been asleep for a while now
You tuck me in just like a child now
'Caust every time you hold me in your arms
I'm comfortable enough to feel your warmth
End Chorus
It starts in my sould
And I lose all control
When you kiss my nose
The feeling shows
'Cause you make me smile
Babe just take your time now
Holding me tight
Wherever, wherever, wherever you go
Wherever, wherever, wherever you go
Wherever you go, I'll always know
'Cause you make me smile
Just for a while
(That's as far as I've gotten with this one. Any suggestions, fellow "Weirdos"?