I just realized that I haven't put my 5 latest parodies on here yet...enjoy!
Original Song
Son, I can't understand it
Why your grades are failing
Already have an F, and it’s week two!
You say you’re going to classes
The teacher’s never see ya – (or your classmates either)
Something just isn’t right
So I must ask you...
Why are you so tardy all the time?
Tardy all the time
Tardy all the time
Not sure why you’re tardy all the time
Tardy all the time
You’re tardy all the time –
(tardy all the time)
Why are you tardy all the time?
(Tardy all the time)
(Tardy all the time) - “I am not tardy ALL the time”
(Tardy all the time).
I hear you go out to clubs
just spending your time dancing
You should be reading, attending class you see.
Your mom and I want you bright
That’s why we pay tuition
We wish that you would take this more seriously
But instead, you’re just tardy all the time
Tardy all the time
Tardy all the time
Younger brother is doing just fine
He’s always on time!
So tell us why you’re tardy all the time
Tardy all the time
Tardy all the time
Can’t you make us happy just this time?
Please show up on time!
(Tardy, tardy, tardy…)
“He’s failing, tardy all the time.
And when he does show up on time-
He puts his head down
His snoring drowns me out
He’s always tardy
He’s out all over town
Tardy all the time - does he want to get a degree!?”
Nah.
Tardy all the time - party all the time.
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Original Song
Hear my nervous voice, when we walk down the street
I know she’s the girl of my dreams
I’m below her hotness, she’s 10, I’m a 5
She smiles and then I almost die…
She kissed me on the cheek, and I start squealing
I did not expect this, inhaler’s nearby
Now I feel my heart beat fast, “We’re going too fast!”
And yet, we’re still outside…
“You wanna have some fun?” is what she asked me
And I’m just so nervous, “I should go inside
It is getting late now, so…
I think I should go
Thank you for tonight”
“Sorry for the hassle, sorry for last night
This date will go better, I’ll try”
She took me to her place, surprised what I saw
Her best friend baring it all...
And I felt so dumb, “I should be leaving,”
And then they start to kiss, I avert my eyes
Oh man, I feel like an ass, I run really fast
Not me that she likes
“You wanna have some fun?”, was not sarcastic
My friend just told me this, then he starts to cry
He asks for her address “Yo!
Can’t leave them alone…
Get the hint next time!”
And now I feel so dumb, I could be with them
Instead, I’m really pissed…one chance in my life
Now my friend’s having a blast, man, he’s such an ass!
Get the hint next time!
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Original Song
Come on wake up! Man, let’s go, we gotta leave
We gotta leave if you want to get there by two
We’ll beat traffic, so get in the car with me
No, we don’t have a van, but our small car will do
Bags in the trunk, come on son- let’s pick up speed
I know it’s three AM, want to have fun, don’t you?
Don’t wake your sister, everyone still wants to sleep
We’re gonna have some fun on this road trip, WOO HOO!
We have to drive 500 miles
And we’ll have fun, we won’t be bored
We will be that fam who drives for miles and miles
See things have not before
Now we’re driving, just drove into Kentucky
We’ve gone through tons of snacks, made a pit stop or two
Now my honey, can tell she is restless too
Everybody’s getting ancy, what to do?
We could go home (“Dad, let’s go home”), but I want them all to see
Want them to see the things I saw when I was two
My kids think I’m old, but I know they will thank me
They’re gonna say, “Thanks dad for taking us with you!”
Well we have drove 100 miles
And only have 400 more
I will be that dad who brings his children smiles
They won’t think I’m a bore
Are we there yet!? (Are we there yet!?)
Are we there yet!? (Are we there yet!?)
If you ask one more time, I’ll turn this car around!
Are we there yet!? (Are we there yet!?)
Are we there yet!? (Are we there yet!?)
Why don’t you take a nap, I’ll wake you when in town!
Eyes are sleepy, everybody fell asleep
I’m gonna drive some more before I pass out too
Kids were screaming, wrestling ‘round and hit my seat
And I’ve been driving for some time, we’re almost through
The sun goes down (“Dad, where are we?”), in the distance I can see
Can finally see the place, the place we’re driving to
And when we left home(“Can we go home?”), didn’t say where we would be
I told my kids, “Enjoy this singing cockatoo…
I said you’d have a blast, and isn’t that the truth!”
Well we just drove 500 miles
Now have to drive 500 more
We could take a plane and fly those miles and miles
But that would be a bore!
“That was so dumb! (That was so dumb!)
That was so dumb! (That was so dumb!)
We spent three days on the road, heard a bird sing “la, la, la”
Take us home now! (Now more trips now!)
Take us home now! (We won’t go out!)
We drove five hundred miles to see a bird!? That’s dumb!
Cancelled plans now! (Just to go out!)
Friends won’t find out! (Won’t see slide show!)
Would have rather seen that giant ball of twine!
This is one trip (It was so dumb!)
We won’t forget (You had our trust!)
Won’t happen again, there won’t be a next time!
Well, we just drove 500 miles
And I would jump out the car door
And you should do the same if your dad doesn’t say
Where you go, it’s a bore!”
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Original Song
When I was young, “Eat your fruits and veggies!”
“Come on mom, it looks really gross!”- but
Now I am much older, moved on
Carnival food isn’t bad, you can’t go wrong!
Mmm-mmm, Mmm-mmm
Sir, give me that fried dough, take it right from the fryer
I’ll take that corn dog too, but please add a stick of butter
Oh man!
No, I shouldn’t be eating all this grease, no
Sure it tastes great, but it’s better with gravy
The best kind is the deep fried, well
There’s nothing I won’t try
Hey, just for fun, let’s throw in this salmon
Popsicles, while they still are frozen
This bacon cheeseburger is good
It’s on a stick! This cuisine, you can’t go wrong!
The best kind is the deep fried, well
There’s nothing I won’t try
It’s all good in my eyes; just cover it all in bacon
Roll this up; yes I know it’s an extra-large pizza
I beg you please, take mayonnaise my good man
Add some bacon bits, and then please deep fry my hand
Found some cake on the ground; let’s dip that in the batter,
Mmmm, it’s so good- won’t listen to my doctor cause
The best kind is the deep fried, well
There’s nothing I won’t try
But then I paid the price, went on Tilt-a-Whirl
What happened next wasn’t fun…
And then I had a thought, “Aw man, I should’ve trusted mother
Is food much better when it’s in the fryer?”
And then I realized the thoughts I was thinkin’
Shrugged it off and laughed- “Look at that oil glisten!”
When I die young, bury me with bacon
Lay me down with a side of French fries
Funnel cake and mayonnaise, whole ton!
You’ll need a crane to pick me up when I’m done
Mmm-mmm (Mmm-mmm)
This cuisine sure is fun (Yum yum!)
Full of grease and lard
The line, it starts here, wait until I order
Said I’m eating fine, so just please don’t tell my doctor, no
The best kind is the deep fried, well
There’s nothing I won’t try
So, do all your best boys…I’ll be here awhile
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Original Song
Another scary movie
Last October ev’ning
So much violence, house is silent
I’m sitting here shakin’
I can’t see, please help me, scary night- Halloween!.
In my head, I feel dread…something’s happ’ning
The house shakes, I hear moans
I see bones, then I run
“In my head, in my head…this ain’t happ’ning!”
Want my head, want my head,
Zombies! Zombies! Zombies!
Brains! Brains! They want my head,
I’m so dead!
Zombies! Zombies! Zombies!
Oh God! Oh no!
Into my house they break in
Heart they’re wanting also
First was dozens, now there’s hundreds
Wanting what they’re after
Man they’re skin’s so-o green, been dead since ‘17
Grabbed my hand, I’m so dead! No use fighting
With their teeth, bite my arm
Now I’m done, cause I’m one
Find a head, need a head…cause I’m starving!
People fled! “Living dead!
Zombies! Zombies! Zombies!
Run! Run!” We want your head
Want your head!
“Zombies! Zombies! Zombies!
Oh God! Oh no!”
WEIRDABBOTT