World of Weird Al Yankovic

You say we gotta treasure each moment, who knows how long we're going to be around...

What should I do to prepare for the Earth's inevitable crash into the Sun?

Some girls like to buy new shoes and others like driving trucks and wearing tattoo's.

Didn't you see me hold up my index finger?

I'm not crazy, I perform this way!

And in the morning, I wake up in utter horror.....

That isn't a question, you lose. I'll answer anyway:

See severed heads that almost fall right in your lap!

Are you still mad I gave a Mohawk to your cat?

I was just so overwhelmed by its sheer immensity, I had to pop myself a beer.

That thing was hideous, what were you thinking?

Umm, I think you have something in your teeth.

I'm sorry, what did you want again?

I'd like to take you home right now, so you can meet my mom

Are you picking up the subtle innuendo here?

Wait a minute, I'll go check...

Sweetie Pumpkin, do you wanna join the Columbia Record Club?

I... HATE... SAUERKRAUT!!!

Where's my liquid paper, where's my liquid paper?

In a box under the stairs in a corner of the basement of the house half a block from Jerry's Bait Shop. You know the place.

Tell me, what can he do that I can't do better?